Beckoning Bollocks!

In today’s news, a London based plastic surgeon called Patrick Malluci, often seen on the British Channel4 show Embarrassing Bodies, did a study of 1300 people and found that 87 percent ranked breasts with a scientific 45:55 ratio as their favourite. This measures the percentage of breast above or below the nipple line. That’s 45 percent of the breast on top and 55 percent below the nipple. The study surmised that this ratio depicts a 20 degree upward angle and produces a “beckoning breast”. I kid you not! And it is this beckoning breast that people in the study equated with attractiveness.

Go on, Google it and shake your head! Our world has well and truly gone mad!

Since a world of women have only just recovered from the advent of the “thigh gap”, along comes another pathetic study for fragile women folk to measure their inadequacy against. Here’s an idea? Let’s put money into into cancer research, mental health programs, education and the environment!

Despite not yet completing my cosmetic surgery to restore my breasts, I think it’s too late to say to my breast surgeon and plastic surgeon “Please save my life, and by the way when you rebuild my breasts can you give them that beckoning look?”

After three breast surgeries including a lumpectomy and two nipple-sparing subcutaneous mastectomies with insertion of tissue expanders, with a dash of radiation to my left breast, my meridian ratio goes a little like this.

Left 25:75
Right 40:60

That’s two measurements for me cause I’m special! Catch you later. My perfect orange beckons.

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